This is a picture of my Grandma. Her name is Helen and she is 98 years old. She went into a facility about a year ago, and now her days are wholly occupied with waiting; Helen is waiting to die. It is a horrible thing that I would not wish on my worst enemy, and sometimes it is hard to understand just why it is that my grandmother has to go through it. It is the worst kind of hell on earth.
Helen used to be a young and vibrant woman; I have the photos to prove it. She was independent until just a couple of years ago, and I have so many memories of my grandma my cup truly runs over. But now she is ready to go home, and when she looks into my eyes and says that she just wants to die, it makes me feel the same way.
It seems like some people are taken from us way too soon, and then there are others who it seems as though God has completely forgotten about; furthermore, there is no rhyme or reason to any of it. But I don’t believe that life is random and chaotic; I don’t believe that at all. What I do believe is that all things work together for a greater purpose and that although we may never know the method behind the madness, we can rest assured that there is indeed a method.
What I really do wish is that we as humans would stop clinging to this notion that we have to live no matter what, and that it is a great big giant sin against God if we decide to end our time here on earth. There is absolutely no evidence to support that, and Helen should be allowed to move on if she wants to. It is humans who prevent her from doing that…NOT God.
This is my grandma and I love her. And sadly, she is Waiting to Die…